Selfish or Self Love?
The line between being selfish and choosing yourself can be quite blurry. These situations are difficult to manage, wondering if the decision you are making is hurting rather than helping. This constant back and forth can become exhausting. We at The Edge are here to help create a bold line between the two.
POV: You’ve had a long week of work and school. You are trying to balance everything all at once. It’s a Tuesday night, and you know the week ahead will be jam-packed with assignments. The days are starting to blend together, and your to-do list is feeling more like a novel. Then, it hits you — your friends have been planning to go out tonight. It’s another thing to somehow pencil in your calendar, wishing there were more than 24 hours in a day. Taking a night in, regardless of it being a big celebration or a normal night out during the week is perfectly fine. You are not being selfish if you know you have a big test the next day or a full schedule that week. You are doing what is best for you, your mental health and just your normal, daily life. The stress we face as college students to fulfill this “go, go, go” lifestyle is harder than it looks. There’s a lot of anxiety that comes between making decisions like these. But, the question we have to answer is, “Is this good for my physical and mental health?” Sometimes, we all just need to take a break, and that is perfectly fine!
Let’s transition to another anxiety-inducing topic: relationships. Whether platonic or romantic, surrounding yourself with people who support you and bring positivity to your life is incredibly important. Let’s face it — relationships, in general, are hard to manage. This is where we have to be cognizant of if the relationship is toxic or not. A toxic relationship involves gaslighting, mind games, dramatic situations, lack of empathy and much more. This type of relationship is one where you feel misunderstood and not supported by the other person, adding more stress and anxiety to your life. Attempting to keep these strings from snapping exerts so much energy and time that you may not have. Cutting these ties is hard. However, knowing in the long run you will be happier and healthier is all that matters. As our queen Selena Gomez once said, “I needed to lose you to love me,” and we stand by that (and are team Selena all the way). So, maybe take a step back and think about if the relationship you're in is really healthy for you. If the answer is no, then you are not in any way being selfish for putting yourself first and exiting a toxic situation.
Repeat after us: I am not being selfish for taking a night in. I am not being selfish for prioritizing my education. I am not being selfish for removing someone from my life if all they bring is negativity. I am not being selfish for prioritizing my physical and mental health.
Find the people who are supportive, loving and understanding. Weed out the ones who are not, and seek all the positivity you can.